Christmas Cavalcade 2020, Part Three

With just one week to go, it’s time for another couple of festive-themed tracks for you, all part of this year’s Christmas Cavalcade.

 

First up is a find from our old friend Stephen ‘Beany’ Green, who was kind enough to send me a whole CD of funky festiveness recently. It’s British actor Arthur Treacher (I still have no idea if he was related to Bill ‘EastEnders’ Treacher…) and his rather unique take on the classic Santa Clause is Comin’ To Town. Treacher began his movie career in the 1930s, appearing in four Shirley Temple vehicles, and as butler Jeeves in a brace of early P. G. Wodehouse adaptations.

 

In the 1960s he became a regular face on TV in America, eventually becoming announcer and on-screen sparring partner to Merv Griffin. He made two albums with Griffin, Merv Griffin and Arthur Treacher in London: ‘Alf and ‘Alf a collection of musichall favourites, and the clumsily-titled Big Christmas Album For Merv Griffin and TV Family, which also featured an early musical outing from TV actor David Soul and, naturally, Santa Clause is Comin’ To Town.

 

Next up is Derrik Roberts and There Won't Be Any Snow (Christmas In The Jungle) an early (1965) Vietnam War-themed disc that’s guaranteed to warm the cockles at this time of year. It follows the same plot used by so many other pro- and anti-Vietnam discs, but I won’t spoil the denouement for you!

 

There’s not much info out there about this one and, confusingly, on promo copies the singer(s) are credited as a duo, Derrik and Roberts, rather than just Derrik Roberts. The disc was penned and produced by Vance and Pockriss who, between them, were responsible for dozens of hits and even more misses, from the great (Catch a Falling Star and Itsy Bitsy Teeny Weenie Yellow Polka Dot Bikini) to the reprehensible (Playground in My Mind and Without Your Love [Mr Jordan] Parts One and Two).

 

As an extra I’m also including the video to Jon Bon Jovi’s horrific remake of Fairytale of New York… a recording so bad that the record company have forbidden people to add their comments on YouTube after it was Universally panned.

 

I’ve never been a fan of their music – although part of that may be my jealousy at being too fat to fit into all of that spandex or too bald to be able to join a hair metal outfit – but Jon himself (who, 40 years ago brought us the Christmas Classic R2-D2 We Wish You A Merry Christmas) is a pretty stand up fella, doing immense good work in his local community, and I do feel a bit mean, but this truly is Godawful, and the new lyrics suck balls. It really should not exist, but I’m kind of glad it does. 

And if that’s not enough awful audio, why not join me on Wednesday, 2pm GMT/7pm Eastern for a whole hour of Christmassy crap – including all three of these turkeys - on The World’s Worst Records Radio Show: https://wfmu.org/playlists/WR

 

Enjoy! 

Download Santa HERE 

Download Jungle HERE