Seriously. Footballers cannot sing. We’ve proved the point
on numerous occasions in the past but here is yet more irrefutable evidence
that no footballer should ever be let loose in a recording studio.
Yes, it’s infamous ladies man and famous alcoholic George
Best as ‘a creepy computer voice’ (as Howard Wolowitz would put it), the man
who – in my household – is important only because his moniker provided the name
for the debut album by the awesome Wedding Present.
Back in the 80s there was this mad fashion for celebrity
keep fit albums. Kick started by Jane Fonda (although less well-known names had
been making exercise records since at least the 1930s), by the time Georgie
Best Superstar (wears frilly knickers and a Playtex bra) had teamed up with
Mary Stavin (Swedish actress, former Miss World and Best’s current squeeze) to
release this abortion the Shape Up And Dance series had reached nine – yes, nine – volumes. A whole nine albums
worth of wretched nonsense from the likes of Isla St Clair, co-presenter of the TV show the Generation Game, Jay Aston of Bucks Fizz, actress Felicity Kendal, newsreader
Angela Rippon and (of course) Lulu. The series would end, after just three
years, with volume 10 presented by singer Patti Boulaye.
The music featured on the albums usually consisted of
anonymous cover versions of hit records, so what a coup the producers of the
series must have felt when they managed to persuade George and Mary to record a
cover of the Marvin Gaye and Kim Weston hit It Takes Two. Sadly, although the track was also issued as a
single (coupled with an instrumental version), it was not a hit (neither was
the album it was culled from) and is to the best of my knowledge the only time
George attempted to launch a career in pop music… although he may well have appeared
on other, football related recordings by any of the various teams he played
for. The b-side, Sasquatch, is
thoroughly ridiculous and will give you a taste of the rest of the album.
Stavin, who had previously released the Eurodisco single Feeling
Good, Being Bad in 1979, appeared in two
of Roger Moore's James Bond films. In Octopussy (1983), she played an Octopussy
girl, and in A View to a Kill (1985), she played agent Kimberley Jones. She
also played the Icelandic businesswoman Heba in Twin Peaks
(Season 1, Episode 6), and appeared in the videos for two Adam (and the) Ant
(s) singles, Ant Rap and Strip. Once described by The Irish Football Association
as the ‘greatest player to ever pull on the green shirt of Northern Ireland’, Best
sadly died in 2005 of multiple organ failure, the legacy of a lifetime of heavy
drinking.
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