It's Carnivale Time!

Happy almost New Year everybody! I have three tracks for you today from New Jersey’s Damian and the Criterions.

Damian is Damian Vecchioli, and he and his ‘band’ the Criterions released at least three self-funded albums – Versatility, Giglio Carnivale and Avant Garde - and one 45 of low-fi nonsense in the early 1980s. I use parentheses for the word ‘band’ as it appears that Damian was pretty much a solo artist. 

Damian also recorded as Damian and the Street People, issuing a pair of 45s, Witches Brew (a re-issue of the Avant Garde album track included here) and Funk With a Punk (a re-titled issue of another Avant Garde track The Slam). Any money earned from the latter 45 was to be donated to a ‘non-denominational mission fund’.

Judging by his obsession with the Neapolitan giglio feast (a festival held to honour the fifth century bishop St. Paulinus of Nola), it’s a safe bet to suggest that his family may have Italian ancestry. Vecchioli is not a common name, but I can find no record of a Damian Vecchioli living in New York or New Jersey at any time. Also, Damian isn’t a very Italian-sounding name, which leads me to believe that it was, in fact a pseudonym. Of all the Vecchiolis I have found listed, only two fit the time frame - Peter Paul Vecchioli, who was born in New Jersey in 1946 and died in 2004, and John Vecchioli, born in New York but died in Florida in 2013. If anyone out there knows anything about Damian and/or his career please do get in touch.

Here are both sides of Damian’s first 45, Giglio Carnivale and La Barca, issued on Dorell Records (both tracks later turned up on the Versatility album), plus Witches Brew and the Slam from his third album Avant Garde.

Enjoy!

Christmas Cavalcade 2016 (Part Four)

Here we go: the final instalment for this year.

Today’s Christmassy selection kicks off with British Comedian Ken Goodwin, star of 70s TV who, some of you may recall, scored a hit in 1972 with the sugary . Well, in 1979 our Ken released a Christmas album – Merry Christmas Darling – and revisited his seven year old hit, rerecording a festive version replete with sleigh bells and creepy child. The result is even worse than the original. Hurrah!

Nothing quite says Christmas like an album from a ganja smoking albino reggae singer, does it? Next up, from his 2003 release A Very Very Yellow Christmas, here’s Yellowman (a.k.a. Winston Foster) with We Wish You a Reggae Christmas. It's not great, but when you consider that the man lost half of his face to cancer in 1986 it's a surprise he's still making records at all.

We’ve enjoyed the unique song stylings of talent show reject William Hung before: like Susan Boyle the man has managed to eke out a career from failure – although unlike SuBo none of his albums have hit the top spot and he has never been the recipient of a Guinness World Record. Anyway, we’re quibbling. Here’s William with The Little Drummer Boy from his second album, 2004’s Hung For the Holidays. 

I feel a bit conflicted about our final choice – after all the poor woman is clearly not well these days, as her recent appearance on Dr Phil showed – but this was recorded 25 years ago when she was still relatively sane. And besides, it’s absolutely awful. In 1991 actress Shelley Duvall (The Shining, Popeye) issued the thoroughly dreadful album Hello… I’m Shelly Duvall: Merry Christmas. Doing her best impersonation of Little Marcy, and attended by the obligatory children’s choir, Shelley’s bizarre album was followed by a further release: Hello… I’m Shelly Duvall: Sweet Dreams, although wither one of these albums is enough to give you nightmares. Here’s the award-winning actress with Gotta Be a Christmas... and if I had a wish it would be that the poor woman gets the financial and mental health support she needs this Christmas.

Have a fantastic Christmas, a cool yule and a thoroughly excellent New Year... and a huge thank you to all of you for all of the support, the suggestions and so on.

Enjoy!

Christmas Cavalcade 2016 (Part 3)

The first track from this week’s collection of festive futility is definitely rated NSFW – you have been warned.

We’re kicking off (thanks to a timely reminder from my good friend the Squire) with the thoroughly offensive Jim Davidson and his equally offensive version of White Christmas – knowing how vile the wife beating racist is it should be no surprise to learn that he recorded his version in character as Chalky White, a crass portrayal of a West Indian. When he performed his Chalky material on BBC One’s Seaside Special in 1977 there was public uproar, with The Stage criticising Davidson for his ‘crude racist jokes’, yet this 45 was issued in 1980. This nasty piece of plastic even features a de rigueur children’s choir. What must the head of that particular school (thankfully uncredited on the disc) have been thinking? This is beyond contemptible.

Recorded in 1990, O Holy Night by Steve Mauldin has been doing the rounds for years now. Steve is an arranger and conductor, and the original version was arranged for – and recorded by – The Christ Church Choir and their lead vocalist Guy Penrod. That particular recording was issued, on Sing Noel, by Star Song Records. Steve’s version was recorded in the studio as a bit of a laugh, just to see if he could match the range of Penrod. Clearly he couldn’t. It’s never been officially released, and this has been dubbed from a YouTube video – but it’s one of those things that just had to be heard!

Finally today we have both sides of Leappo The Frog’s 45, Christmas in Frogville and Look Before You Leap. The flip has nothing to do with Christmas, I’m simply including it here for completists (I’m not going top provide you with the other side of the Jim Davidson disc: if you want it go find it yourself!) Issued by Del-Ray Records of Delaware. Co-author Jimmy Stayton was a rockabilly singer who issued four of 45s under his own name in the early 60s. Do yourself a favour and hop over to Dead Wax, where I originally found this clunker.

BTW, it has been suggested that I include some tracks from Ringo Starr’s Christmas album, I Wanna be Santa Claus… but in all fairness that particular album is heaps better than Billy Idol’s genuinely dreadful Happy Holidays. So Ringo gets a pass this year – I may not be so kind in 2017!

Enjoy!

Christmas Cavalcade 2016 (Part Two)

Welcome to Part Two of this year’s Christmas Cavalcade. Three more awful festive-themed tracks for you to suffer along to.

First up is a recording I was blissfully unaware of until yesterday, when The Squire decided to send me in search of a copy. This utterly unspectacular single-entendre novelty, Give U One 4 Christmas, was issued by female ‘vocal’ duo HotPantz a.k.a Kelly Robinson and Shelley Mintrim. This dreadful piece of rubbish actually managed to scrape the UK Singles Chart, peaking at a dizzying number 64. Shocking; in a stocking! It's Ho! Ho! Hopeless! 

Next a pair of tracks sent to me earlier in the year by WWR follower Dan Sheldon. Lee Smith’s A Letter To Mama, issued in 1988 by the tiny Nashville-based country label Airborne Records, backed with a bland, instrumental version of Silent Night - the same track as the a-side minus Lee's heartfelt vocalising. Unfortunately I can't tell you much about either Lee Smith, but Airborne was a country label that had Mickey Gilley, Stella Parton and Mickey Newbury on its books. The company also signed singer Curtis Wright but does not appear to have issued any recordings by him 9at lesat not as a solo act). This appears to have been Lee’s only release: if history is anything to go by I wouldn’t be in the slightest bit surprised to discover that he was a local radio DJ. Maybe someone out there can enlighten us. Airborne's final release (in 1991) was a double album collection of Dr Martin Luther King speeches.

The next track, also provided by our kind benefactor Mr. Sheldon, is Happy Birthday Jesus by Little Christopher Darling (not the same Happy Birthday Jesus as the song recorded by Major Bill Smith or the one by Little Cindy). This time I have been able to find a little info about the Little Darling. Born in 1979 and hailing from Finksburg, Maryland, Little Christopher started singing gospel music at the age of five: he had a ‘hit’ (well, it got played on local radio a couple of times) with a cover of Bobby Grove’s Jesus This Is Jimmy. Happy Birthday Jesus (the same track appears on both sides) was issued as a promo of sorts for a cassette release of the same name and was issued around 1987. LCD released at least one other album (or cassette) entitled Please Don't Tell My Daddy (That Jesus Isn't Real). A surprisingly popular draw at churches in the area (he had ‘a special message for mothers and children’, according to one press notice), he was known locally as ‘the Little Evangelist’.

Anyway – have a listen and we what you think., If you can bear it I’ll be back next Friday with more.

Enjoy!

Christmas Cavalcade 2016 (Part One)

Hello folks! Yes, it’s that time of the year again – with just 23 days left until Christmas the next few WWR posts will concentrate on obscure, bizarre and just plain awful festive-themed discs, a cornucopia of cacophonous Christmas caterwauling if you will, to soundtrack the season. Oh yes!

We’re kicking off with some seasonal plagiarism: songs that have stolen something from someone or somewhere, and first up today is our old friend the song-poem stalwart Gene Marshall (a.k.a Gene Merlino), with the double sided ‘hit’ Merry Christmas All and Christmas Day. The disc, issued by Preview in the early 70s, is in pretty poor shape, so my apologies for the poor quality, but what interests me is that the tune for the a-side – with lyrics credited to one Alexander Liftee – has clearly been Liftee-d from the much better known Jingle Bell Rock. Flipside Christmas Day, is a mediocre slice of song-poem hokum from the pen of Milton Cobham.

Next we have both sides of the 1959 45 from Kenny and Corky, a pair of singing puppets stealing David Seville’s Chipmunks shtick wholesale. Nuttin’ For Christmas was originally a hit for six-year-old Barry Gordon (and five other acts) in 1955. Many of you will know the flip side, Suzy Snowflake from the vastly superior (!) version recorded by Marcy Tigner, a.k.a Little Marcy. Issued by budget kiddie brand Big Top the disc was a minor hit in the States, which prompted the highly collectable London label to issue the coupling in the UK in November 1959. Barry Gordon went on to find fame as an actor, appearing in everything from Alfred Hitchcock Presents to Star Trek: Deep Space Nine, Star Trek: Voyager and Curb Your Enthusiasm. A noted voice actor, he served as the president of the Screen Actor’s Guild and, in 1998, was the Democratic Party nominee for the United States Congress for Pasadena, California.

Enjoy!

Bob's Your Uncle

Bob Monkhouse: does he need an introduction? Game show host, presenter, comedian, comedy scriptwriter and advertising spectre (he appeared, posthumously, in an award-winning ad campaign for Prostate Cancer Awareness four years after his own death from the disease): in a career that spanned more than 50 years he did pretty much everything and became a national institution in the process.

In 1968 CBS in Britain signed Bob, issuing the 45 I Remember Natalie, a minor hit reaching Number 54 in March 1969. A pleasant but unspectacular pop song, the disc is more notable for its B-side – In My Dream World - which was co-written by Mark ‘Excerpt From a Teenage Opera’ Wirtz. Wirtz also arranged and conducted the orchestra on both sides.

CBS followed this with the less-than stellar coupling I present for you today. Produced by Mike Smith, the man who wanted to sign The Beatles to Decca (but who was overruled by his boss Dick Rowe), Another Time, Another Place, Another World is a dull-as-ditchwater ballad which Bob should probably have stayed away from. The flip, When I Found You is slightly less offensive; a slow and undemanding waltz which Bob’s voice can just about manage. Bob co-wrote the B-side, and he and co-conspirator Keith Mansfield came up with something that wouldn’t be too taxing for his limited range. I Remember Natalie had some redeeming features: this does not. It’s typical of so much other TV tie-in fodder: uninspired and utterly disposable. 

Unsurprisingly there was no third single. The next time the public would hear Bob’s singing voice (apart from his own occasional outbursts on his many TV shows) would be when he performed the theme tune to the dire BBC sitcom You Rang M’Lord. He went back to what he did best, presenting game shows including The Golden Shot, Celebrity Squares, Wipeout, Family Fortunes, Opportunity Knocks and countless others. Like many of the old guard – including his friend Frankie Howerd – his comedy career went through a renaissance in the 1980s when he returned to his first love, stand up to excellent reviews.

Enjoy!

The Testament According to Albert DeSalvo

As Mick Jagger once asked: ‘Have you heard about the Boston Strangler?’

Between 1962 and 1964 the city of Boston was terrorised by an ultra-violent serial killer, originally dubbed The Mad Strangler, but more popularly known (thanks to a series of press articles in 1963) as the Boston Strangler. In all 13 single women between the ages of 19 and 85 were murdered: most were sexually assaulted and strangled in their apartments by what was assumed to be one man.

In late 1964, in addition to the Strangler murders, the police were also trying to solve a series of rapes committed by a man who had been dubbed the Green Man. After a stranger entered a young woman's home in East Cambridge, tied her to a bed and sexually assaulted her, he left, saying ‘I'm sorry’. Her description led police to identify the assailant as Albert Henry DeSalvo, former naval petty officer and long-time petty criminal. When his photo was published, many women identified him as the man who had assaulted them. DeSalvo was not originally connected with the murders, but he gave a detailed confession to a cellmate George Nassar and, under hypnosis, to Doctor William Joseph Bryan, Jr., after he was charged with rape. However, there was no physical evidence to substantiate his confession and, because of this, he was tried for earlier, unrelated crimes of robbery and sexual offences.

After DeSalvo was apprehended, news reporter and author Dick Levitan (who worked for Boston’s talk radio station WEEI), was one of the very few reporters allowed to interview him. In a very creepy twist, Levitan was paid an undisclosed sum by Astor Records to record himself narrating DeSalvo’s words (rumour has it that the company also paid DeSalvo $50), putting him together with the local Beatles-influenced beat group The Bugs to produce Strangler in the Night. The Bugs also provided the b-side, Albert, Albert, about DeSalvo’s crime spree. The sleeve for the single reads: “...These are my thoughts, feelings and emotions.” Albert H. DeSalvo. These days it sells (well, people advertise copies for sale) for anything from $20 to $200.

The true identity of the murderer of the 13 women has been the cause of much debate over the years. Although DeSalvo copped for the crimes he was never tried for them and consequently never found guilty. He was found stabbed to death in the infirmary of Walpole State prison in 1973. 40 years later Boston law enforcement officials announced that DNA evidence had linked DeSalvo to 19-year-old Mary Sullivan, the last of the Boston Strangler’s victims. DeSalvo's remains were exhumed, and further DNA tests proved that the seminal fluid recovered at the scene of Mary Sullivan's 1964 murder was, in fact, DeSalvo’s.

Here are both sides of this infamous recording.

Enjoy!

Arcesi's Baby

Born John Anthony Arcesi (pronounced 'RCC') in Sayre, Pennsylvania in February 1917 of Italian immigrant parents, John Arcesi turned professional after winning a talent contest organised by Blackstone the Magician (Harry Blackstone, Sr.) when he was just 10 years old. Singing locally wherever he could get a gig in 1933, after a fire almost destroyed the family home, he decided to travel to NYC in the hope of becoming a band vocalist like his idols Bing Crosby and Russ Columbo.

In 1934 he made his first professional recordings for the Columbia label as singer for Lud Gluskin and his Orchestra, before moving to Bluebird as singer for Louis 'King' Garcia in 1936. John took a job at the Mills Music Publishing Company, based in the famous Brill Building, as a song demonstrator and office assistant during the day, singing in clubs around New York at night. When  it was suggested to him that the name Arcesi sounded too ethnic he changed it, recording as Don Darcy from 1935–45, and Johnny Darcy from 1946-1950.

For several years Darcy sang with Joe Venuti's Orchestra and he recorded with  a number of different acts on an equal number of different labels until, in 1952, he was signed as a featured singer by Capitol Records. Reverting to his original birth name, he garnered several column inches when, while performing the song Lost In Your Love in Las Vegas he put a young woman by the name of Ariel Edmunson in to an hypnotic trance which supposedly lasted some 39 hours. It was a publicity stunt, of course, but it worked. 

John's first single release with Capitol was Wild Honey/Moonlight Brings Memories. Capitol ran several full pages ads in Billboard magazine promoting the disc and even sent deejays jars of honey in the hope of gaining a few spins. Reviews were not fooled though: Billboard’s Bill Smith wrote that he used ‘a lot of artificial poses that are glaringly apparent and studied. His singing style is very slow and very deliberate. In fact he comes to a dead stop at the end of each line in such a manner that time and again it looked like he blew the lyrics.’ When he tried to pull yet another silly stunt to promote his latest record Smith dismissed it as so ‘corny that it had plant written all over it. Based on voice quality alone Arcesi might make it, but the build-ups, stunts and tricky arrangements dreamed up for him are not going to help very much. The dough could be used to better advantage teaching him how to sell’.

Despite all that Capitol continued to have faith: in March 1953 Arcesi recorded four sides with Nelson Riddle, three written by Arcesi himself, and he was voted third most promising 'new singer' by Billboard, following Al Martino and Steve Lawrence. Sadly fame was not to be found, and in spite of further name changes (including Tony Conti and Chick Johnson) Arcesi’s fifteen minutes were already up. By the beginning of the 60s he had all-but retired.

Then, in 1972, an album entitled Reachin' Arcesia was released by the tiny Alpha Records. Just 300 copies of the album were pressed (the same company also issued a 45 by John Arcesi, It's All According/Love is Like A Mountain sometime around 1968), although it has been widely pirated since. A further 45  Reaching/Pictures In My Window was released in 1979 by the Honolulu-based Orpheus-Alephia label (Arcesi moved to the island in 1974). Confusingly Reaching and Love is Like A Mountain are the same song: even more confusing is that the album bears absolutely no relation to anything Arcesi recorded during his big band or ballad singer years.

The eleven songs on Reachin' Arcesia are almost beyond description; ridiculous and overblown, kind of psychedelic but with garage-punk production values, it’s as if Jim Morrison had never died. It is, frankly, utterly bizarre and utterly beguiling. Having made his masterwork, John Arcesi would never record again, instead he spent the last years of his life painting and dealing in art.

John died in Palm Springs, California on April 12, 1983 at the age of 66.

Here is a brace of cuts from the awesome, jaw-dropping Reachin' Arcesia: The Leaf and the preposterous Mechanical Doll.

Enjoy!

Groovin' With God

One of the oddest albums you’re likely to hear contains the psychedelic sermons of Pastor John V. Rydgren.

Born February 14, 1932 Rydgren – also known as Brother John - was the head of the TV, Radio and Film Department of the American Lutheran Church. He came to prominence in the mid 60s when his syndicated radio show, a half hour of rock ‘n’ roll and religion called Silhouettes, could be heard broadcast across the U.S.

An attempt to make the church seem relevant to teenagers of the day, American Armed Forces Radio picked up Silhouettes and broadcast it daily to troops in Vietnam until at least 1970. Positioning himself as a hip and trendy preacher, Rydgren wrote, announced and programmed Silhouette, taking his musical and cultural cues from the emerging psychedelic rock scene and the summer of love. Rydgren delivered his sonorous sermons over the top of current pop hits (such as Music To Watch Girls By) and treated listeners to his thoughts on spirituality and the changing times in his deep baritone voice. The American Lutheran Church released several LPs of his thoughts and musings – featuring a mishmash of fuzz guitars, Hammond organ, choirs, sitars and more – including Silhouette Segments (1968).

As the church saw it, Rydgren was an obvious choice as host: ‘I like music,’ he told Billboard magazine’s Claude Hall in 1967. ‘I worked my way through part of seminary at the turntables of a rock station in Columbus, Ohio. (We’re) following Christ’s pattern. He went where the action was… where the people were’. 

Married twice with two sons and a daughter, Brother John suffered a stroke whilst on air in 1982 and, sadly, died from a heart attack on December 26, 1988, at the age of just 56. DJ Food, who has sampled Brother John, is an avid collector and you can read more about John Rydgren and his work here.

Omni Records reissued remastered versions of Rydgren's three LPs, along with bonus tracks and an additional LP, They Say, in a two-disc set in 2012.

Rydgren's Silhouette segments are simply stunning, and you can find 19 of them (if you really want to) here.

Enjoy!

Keep It Under Cover

As mad as it may seem, in 1966 a man wearing a ski mask appeared on The Merv Griffin Show (a syndicated talk show started in 1965) on American TV singing a terrible song called The Covered Man. No, it wasn’t Batman or any of his on-screen villains, nor was it the mysterious masked vigilante El Kabong – no, our covered man would go on to become one half of TV detective duo Husky and Starch, and score several international hit singles in the 1970s. Yes, the covered man singing The Covered Man was in fact David Soul (born David Solberg in 1943).

It seems it was Merv’s idea that Soul wear the ski mask, and Merv – as producer/mentor/manager of the young actor – refused to let him rake the damn thing off. The idea seems to have been that people would have been too distracted by Soul’s good looks to take him seriously as a folk singer.

Seriously?

Soul made 25 appearances on the Merv Griffin Show with his balaclava in place. Poor thing. Unmasked he would go on to appear on Flipper, Star Trek and many other TV shows before landing the role that would make him famous, that of Detective Ken ‘Hutch’ Hutchinson on Starsky and Hutch, a role he played from 1975 until 1979.

Now living in London with wife number five (he’s admitted in the past to having beat wife number three – Patti Carnel Sherman who was formerly married to teen idol Bobby Sherman - whilst she was seven months pregnant and while he was dealing with alcoholism), Soul is still acting and occasionally turns up on the West End stage and on TV. He starred as TV talk show host Jerry Springer (a kind of proto Jeremy Kyle for you younger readers) in the stage show Jerry Springer the Opera, which was also broadcast (amid much protest) by the BBC.

The backing band on this single (and, apparently, two more released by Soul on MGM) was the Blues Project, featuring Steve Katz who later went on to form Blood, Sweat & Tears, and Al Kooper, the famed session musician who has played with Bob Dylan (that’s him on organ on Like a Rolling Stone), Gene Pitney, the Rolling Stones The Royal Teens (he plays guitar on Short Shorts), The Who, Alice Cooper and countless others.

Still, here are both sides of David’s outings as The Covered Man: The Covered Man and the Charles Aznavour song I Will Warm Your Heart.

Enjoy!

Top image half-inched from 45cat.com

Bel Canto Banshee

As you’ll all be very aware, for the last couple of years my life has been pretty much taken over by Florence Foster Jenkins, feted by many (including me) for the horrible quality of her singing.

But opera is full of bad singers. Some, like Anna Russell, sang badly on purpose and earned quite a decent living from it. Others, like Florence, were completely sincere about her shtick... and it is here that we find the Portuguese diva Natalia de Andrade.

Late in her life Madame Natalia recorded two 33rpm albums of her chronic caterwauling, murderous interpretations of works by composers such as Verdi and Puccini. The covers feature a smiling, elderly woman. Neither album is dated, but the story goes that she spent all of her money on her musical career and even borrowed to pay for her own recorded legacy... she once claimed that ‘It is only through my albums that Portugal can hear me.’ After appearing on TV in the 80s she became so famous in her home country that they would refer to Florence Foster Jenkins as ‘America’s Natalia de Andrade’. She even inspired pianist Carlos Pereira to compose a series of solos entitled Four Meditations on Natalia de Andrade, and she became the subject of a documentary Natalia, the Tragicomic Diva.

Her mother, Maria de Andrade, was a singer and gave piano lessons at home; she seems to have cultivated Natalia’s talent, accompanying her daughter in concerts from the age of 10. Later her parents enrolled her at the National Conservatory of Lisbon for voice and piano lessons. Her father worked for the newspaper O Seculo and moved in musical circles, and in 1940 Natalia appeared in the cast of an opera by composer Ruy Coelho in Lisbon Coliseum. After her father died the two women continued to live together: Natalia never married.

She appears to have been a pretty mediocre student, yet somehow it seems that when she was in her mid-50s (around 1964) she was able to record an album (Colecion De Arias De Operas Portuguesas) for Columbia in Madrid (according to her diary these sessions were also self-funded) and she later recorded for Valentim de Carvalho in Lisbon. Her dairy goes in to details of how Natalia would go hungry and would pawn everything she owned (apart from her beloved piano) to pay for these sessions. Her later albums were recorded some time around 1986, when she was 76.

Natalia died on 19 October 1999, in a home for the elderly, aged 89. Right up to the end she played piano almost daily, and would regale the other residents with stories of how she had once been a star. Several years after her passing my friend Gregor Benko included one of her recordings on his compilation The Muse Surmounted a collection which featured a number of deluded divas including, of course, Florence Foster Jenkins.

Have a listen to her massacring a couple of classical standards and make her what you will.

Enjoy!

Sing An Alexander Silver Song

A quick one today (no, I’m not having a go at the Who), but a goodie no less and a timely follow up to last week’s post I Want a Lovely, Lovely Sausage and Come to Robertson’s by Silver’s People.

Today I bring you the only other known recording on the Alexander Silver label, the David Kaye Sound’s Lorelei backed with Sing An Alexander Silver Song, both written by our friend Alexander Silver.

What becomes obvious as soon as A-side starts is that my earlier assumption, that the lead vocalist of Silver’s People was Alex Silver himself, was wrong. Clearly the vocalist on all four tracks is one and the same, leading me to the inevitable conclusion that he is (or was) in fact David Kaye. Not that that information helps us in any way: there’s no information anywhere on who David Kaye was nor why he thought he was suited to a career in music.

As with the earlier release, there is no clue as to when the disc was issued or indeed no information about the other members of the David Kaye Sound – a woefully inept female backing singer who cannot pronounce the simple phrase ‘higgledy-piggledy’ (instead constantly rendering it ‘higgledy-picklety’), plus a guitarist, bassist and drummer. Each one of them sounds about as competent as the useless musicians employed by song-poem label Tin Pan Alley in the 1970s (although, god love him, the drummer does attempt to exhibit some prowess by trying a solo on the flip side). The matrix gives nothing away either. As usual, if you have any info please do tell! 

Enjoy!

Download Lorelei HERE

Download Alexander HERE

Lovely Sausages

Happy anniversary everybody! Yes, I started this very blog nine years ago this week, and to celebrate this auspicious occasion we have another disc that was suggested by a long-time WWR follower.

Donated to our aural cabinet of curiosities by Steve Simms-Luddington, information on the utterly bizarre promo record I Want a Lovely, Lovely Sausage has been hard to come by, but I have managed to piece together a few facts about it and its creator, Alexander Silver.

Written to promote a prize-winning British butcher, rather than the more famous jam manufacturer, I Want a Lovely, Lovely Sausage and the equally peculiar flip side, Come to Robertson’s was issued some time in the early 70s on the custom Alexander Silver Promotional Records label, written by the same Alexander Silver and performed by Silver’s People – presumably Alex on vocals and the horrendously out of tune guitar, plus two unwilling and under-rehearsed friends on bass and drums.

Alex Silver was a jobbing songwriter who had previously written the England Football Song in 1965, issued as a single-sided single by the small Jackson Recording Company, a custom recording company who also put out the occasional 45 or LP and that was based in Rickmansworth, Hertfordshire. Issued primarily to help bolster England’s chances in the 1966 World Cup (well, it certainly worked!), the song was a hit with Sir Alf Ramsay, was played at the World Cup opening ceremony and at several matches during the competition, and could be heard on television and on radio prior to and during the tournament. Our Alex also wrote an alternative version of the official World Cup Willie theme, but this seems not to have been recorded.

Buoyed by the success of this, Mr. Silver set up his own company. As well as I Want a Lovely, Lovely Sausage his Alexander Silver label issued at least one more 45, the David Kaye Sound’s Lorelei backed with Sing An Alexander Silver Song… both songs, naturally, written by Alexander Silver.

There have been a number of British butchers trading under the name Robertson over the years, and there’s no clue on the label or in the lyrics as to which particular company the disc was cut for. The names of some of the staff are mentioned in the lyrics of the b-side… time for someone to do some detective work.

Enjoy!

What the Eff?

Happy Saturday, my friends!

My recent shout-out for recordings that I have not previously written about turned up this little nugget. Fellow Blogger Bob at Dead Wax brought this to my attention; unfortunately I’ve only been able to find one side of the disc so far (and the B-side at that), but goodness – what a find! (UPDATE: see below!)

Released on the tiny Lorida label, this disc was custom pressed by RCA in 1958 – just about the same time that they were pressing discs for Grace Pauline Chew’s Musicart label. Lorida isn’t a spelling mistake: it’s the name of a small, unincorporated community in eastern Highlands County, Florida. Originally named Istokpoga (a Seminole Indian word meaning ‘drowned man’), the name was changed to Lorida (pronounced lo-reed-a) by then-postmistress Mary Stokes 1937 by simply lopping the ‘f’ off Florida.

Credited to Leona Bass and The Lost Guitars, the amazingly inept I Want to Marry an Egghead appeared as the b-side to Ralph Trullo and The Lost Guitars’ My Heart's With You on Trial. The lyrics to both sides were written by Martin Manders, with René Bruneau providing the music (if you can call it that) to I Want to Marry an Egghead, and Phoebe Cole composing the music for My Heart's With You on Trial. Both songs were published by Fighter Music Publishing Limited in June 1958. Bruneau was an old hand (literally: he was born in 1900), and wrote the music to dozens of copyrighted songs, many of them with lyrics written by one Ed Kukkee (full name Edwin Waldemar Kukkee), including What Happens When a Bug Goes Bugs, Papa Stork is Paying Us a Visit and The Wiggle Wiggle Rag (I wonder if Bob Dylan was aware of that one?). Cole too had form, previously composing the music to the songs Kiss me, Sweet and Kiss me All the Time (both 1957). My assumption is that Mr. Manders sent his lyrics in to song poem-esque services to have them set to music: this is borne out by the fact that all of Cole’s and Bruneau’s co-writers retained copyright in their respective compositions.

Other people associated with Lorida also had connections with the song-poem world: Earl Luton (of Lutone fame) composed at least one side for Lorida, and Harold Crosby - who also issued a 45 on Top Fifty - issued a brace of 45s on Lorida. Mike Sarlo, who performed with a band called the Footstompers on another Lorida release, was a programme director for a Pennsylvania radio station who also dabbled occasionally in songwriting and recording. 

It appears that Manders (1906-1978) was from Allouez village, Green Bay, Wisconsin – quite a way from Florida. It appears too that Lorida issued at least a half dozen 45s during the life of the company, and that this particular coupling was the first. Quite how it came about is a mystery: I assume either Leona or her dad paid for the recording and pressing themselves, or that the Bass family were friends of Martin Manders and he stumped up the $50 or so to have the record cut and pressed.

UPDATE APRIL 2018: friend Bob has tracked down the a-side, Ralph Trullo doing his best Elvis impersonation (and failing miserably) on My Heart's With You on Trial. I have not discovered any further recordings (yet) by Mr. Trullo, but it is my belief that his surname has been Anglicised from Trujillo, a reasonably common name south of the border. 

Enjoy!

Download Heart HERE

More sides from Mrs Slydes

Most of you will already be acquainted with Leona Anderson: I’ve written about her a couple of times before but it’s always nice to revisit old friends, especially if you have something new to share.

And boy, do I. Today I present for you the missing Leona Anderson 45, her second for Columbia and her third release at that point, Limburger Lover/Yo-Ho the Crow.

Let’s have a quick recap of her story (if you want more, there’s a chapter on Leona’s career in my first book: most of what follows is culled from there).

Born Leona Aronson on April 3, 1885, Leona was the younger sister of early cowboy movie star Gilbert ‘Broncho Billy’ Anderson. She began her showbiz career at fifteen and seriously thought about a career as an operatic singer (I’ve read that her brother paid for her to travel to London to study) before appearing in a number of films - thankfully all silent – including Mud and Sand (which starred Stan Laurel as Rhubarb Vaseline) and In the Park which starred Charlie Chaplin. Unsurprisingly she also appeared in several movies directed by and starring her brother. Many years later (in 1959 to be exact) she appeared in the Vincent Price horror film The House on Haunted Hill as the demonic Mrs Slydes.

By the mid-1950s Leona had developed her unique singing style and made many cabaret appearances sending up opera singers: she once said she chose this career because ‘Opera singers just can't kid themselves properly; they never can let their voices go’, which is not a criticism that you could ever level at her. Throughout her career she would wilfully let her voice go just about anywhere it damn well pleased.

Described by Billboard as ‘a gal with cultivated, and broken, pipes’, Leona (erroneously credited as Leonna Anderson) issued her first waxing, Fish, on both 78 and on clear red vinyl 7”, in 1953. Fish was released by Horrible Records (motto: if it’s really a Horrible Record it’s bound to be a hit) and put out as the B-side to the Dr Demento favourite There's A New Sound (The Sound Of Worms Eating Your Brain) by Tony Burrello. Fish was co-written by Burrello, who also played calliope on the track; Bill Baird (a puppeteer who would become better known a decade later for the Lonely Goatherd marionette scene in The Sound of Music) played tuba. 500 copies were originally pressed but within two weeks Horrible Records had received orders for a further 100,000 copies. TV comic Ernie Kovacs heard it and invited her on his show. Aided by Burrello and Murray Leona put together a nightclub act, which she called Songs to Forget; the success of the act, coupled with Kovacs championing her cause led to her recording a cover of the Pattie Page hit The Mama Doll Song (backed with I’m A Fool To Care) for Columbia (featured on this blog before) – of which Billboard wrote ‘her cracked tones, sadly out of tune (have) the same macabre appeal as the miserable chirping of Florence Foster Jenkins’.

Issued in March 1955, more than 18 months before her seminal album Music to Suffer By, her second (and last) 45 for Columbia – and the one I present for you today - featured Limburger Lover and Yo-Ho the Crow. Both songs also appeared, in re-recorded form, on the album. Catalogue info exists for 78 rpm versions of both Columbia singles although, as is often the case with these things, there appear to be more promotional copies of the 45 in circulation that retail copies. A fourth single, Indian Love Call/Habanera, was also issued, in March 1956 as both a 78 and 45 by Unique (it was also issued, with the sides flipped, in Australia: I’m lucky enough to have picked up a copy recently for my own collection). She also recorded a theme tune, of sorts, for the Bob and Ray radio show in March 1956.

‘I sing songs which cannot be ruined,” she once said. “I don’t sing very off-key… just enough. I decided that if I couldn’t be the best I’d be the worst.’

She died, on Christmas Day 1973, in a retirement home in Fremont, Alameda County, California at the age of 88. She may be gone, but she left us with a legacy for which we should be forever grateful.

A copy of this 45 recently turned up on Ebay: I was bidding for it but dropped out at $30. I’ll console myself with the MP3s until the next one turns up.

Enjoy!

Help, Man!

On September 28 this blog will celebrate its ninth anniversary: yes, I’ve been writing about bad music for that long. To celebrate, I asked readers (via our Facebook page) to nominate a favourite bad record that I had not written about, and over the next few weeks I’m going to share some of those suggestions with you. You can suggest your own via the comments section at the end of this post.

Born in 1909, Sir Robert Helpmann was an Australian dancer who became an international ballet star and choreographer as well as a noted actor and director. Openly gay (he lived with his partner for 36 years) and with a flamboyant sense of theatricality, Robert had been on stage since the age of eight. ‘When he was a little chap’, his mother, Mattie Helpman, once revealed, ‘he used to take away my stockings and use them for tights. He would tie feathers round his head, too, and go roaming round the streets until I’m sure people thought I had a lunatic in the family.’

Knighted in 1968, during the 30s and 40s Sir Robert was one of British ballet's premier male dancers. Noted as ‘a dancer who could act and an actor who could dance’, his personality and talent played a vital part in building the fledgling British ballet.

After studying briefly with Anna Pavlova in Melbourne (which had been arranged by his rather dour father), Robert went to London in 1933 to study and perform with the Sadler's Wells Ballet, now known as the Royal Ballet. He was the leading male star with that company from 1934 until his resignation in 1950, frequently appearing with his longtime partner Dame Margot. In the 1937-38 season, he beat Laurence Olivier for the part of Oberon in A Midsummer Night's Dream at the Old Vic, playing opposite Vivien Leigh. He later repeated that role opposite Moira Shearer at the Metropolitan Opera House and on a US tour in 1954.

During his years with Sadler's Wells, Sir Robert took occasional leaves of absence to act, most notably in the classic Michael Powell and Emeric Pressburger film The Red Shoes, a stylish, highly influential movie about backstage life in the ballet. Years later, when an interviewer asked him whether the high-pitched portrayal of the events and lives of the dancers were exaggerated, he replied, ‘Oh, no, dear boy, it was quite understated’. Other film credits included multiple roles in the Tales of Hoffmann, the Bishop of Ely in Olivier’s Henry V and the terrifying Child Catcher in the classic Chitty Chitty Bang Bang. In 1995 Marylin Manson paid tribute, of sorts, via the album Smells Like Children, with Manson dressed as the Child Catcher on the sleeve.

During his career he Puccini's La Boheme and Rimsky-Korsakov's Coq d'Or for the Royal Opera House, Covent Garden, T. S. Eliot's Murder in the Cathedral for the Old Vic and directed the musical Camelot on stage. In 1955 he co-starred with Katharine Hepburn, touing in three Shakespearean plays in Australia, and from 1965 to 1975 he was co-director of the Australian Ballet.

But here’s one thing you’ll struggle to find a mention of in his official biography. In 1963 Helpmann recorded four surf-themed tracks for HMV in Australia. Seriously. Someone at HMV thought the gay, 54 year-old Helpmann could pass as a teen idol and ride on the coat tails of the Beach Boys, Jan and Dean and the like in to the charts. Two cuts from the session were issued as a 45 the following year (the same year he was appointed CBE) - Surfer Doll and I Still Could Care (HMV EA-4620) - with the second pair - Surf Dance and Let-A-Go Your Heart - issued the following year (EA-4665). All four tracks were collected on the Raven EP Sir Robert Helpmann Goes Surfing in 1982, dubbed from vinyl copies as the master tapes could not be located. There’s a hysterical film clip of Helpmann performing Surfer Doll on YouTube if you care to look for it and, apparently, sheet music featuring Robert on the cover in a peroxide blond wig. The first 45 was also issued in the US, on Blue Pacific Records.

Helpmann died in Sydney – appropriately for this anniversary post on September 28 – in 1986 after a long battle with emphysema, caused it seems by a lifetime of heavy smoking. He was 77 years old.

With enormous thanks to Graham Graham for bringing these tracks to my attention, here are all four sides cut by Sir Robert for HMV Australia.

Enjoy!

Death and Disaster, Tommy Dee Style

A couple of weeks ago I introduced you to the delights of Tommy Dee, the stentorial DJ who cut more than a dozen ridiculous records for various labels during his career, several of which dealt with the deaths of musicians. Well, thanks to popular demand, we’re revisiting Tommy today, specifically to have a look at another of his specialities, the patriotic pop song.

There’s a Star Spangled Banner Waving Somewhere/The Hobo and the Puppy (Challenge 612) was issued on 1960, just a year after Tommy’s only hit, Three Stars. There’s a Star Spangled Banner Waving Somewhere tells the story of Francis Gary Powers – usually referred to as Gary Powers –an American pilot who was shot down while flying a U-2 spy plane for the CIA in Soviet Union airspace. The former USAF U-2 was equipped with a state-of-the-art camera designed to take high-resolution photos from the edge of the stratosphere over hostile countries, including the Soviet Union; Power’s mission was to photograph military installations and other important sites.

He was shot down by a surface-to-air missile over Sverdlovsk. Powers was captured and taken to Lubyanka Prison in Moscow. When the U.S. government learned of Powers' disappearance they issued a cover statement claiming a ‘weather plane’ had strayed off course after its pilot had ‘difficulties with his oxygen equipment’. CIA officials did not know that the plane crashed almost fully intact, and the Soviets recovered its equipment. Powers was interrogated extensively by the KGB for months before he made a confession and a public apology for his part in espionage. His trial began on August 17 1960, before the military division of the Supreme Court of the USSR. Members of his family were present, as were attorneys provided by the CIA. Two days later Powers was convicted of espionage and sentenced to ten years confinement, three in prison, the remainder in a labour camp. On February 10 1962, Powers was exchanged, along with American student Frederic Pryor, in a well-publicised spy swap at the Glienicke Bridge in Berlin. The exchange was for Soviet KGB Colonel Vilyam Fisher, known as Rudolf Abel, who had been caught by the FBI and tried and jailed for espionage.

Powers died in August 1977. He had been working as a helicopter traffic pilot reporter for KNBC News Channel 4 when he was forced to make an emergency landing as the helicopter was running out of fuel. As he descended he noticed children playing in the area, and directed the helicopter elsewhere to avoid landing on them. If not for the last-second deviation he might have landed safely. The ‘copter crashed and Powers died instantly.

Our next disc was released by Tommy in February 1967. Roger, Ed And Gus (America's Astronaut Heroes) is a tribute to the astronauts Gus Grissom, Ed White and Roger Chaffee, who had been killed during testing for the Apollo 1 mission at Cape Kennedy, Florida. The men died after fire swept through the spacecraft, designed for a manned flight to the Moon. It was thought an electrical spark started in the area holding oxygen supplies and other support systems which quickly spread in the oxygen-filled atmosphere of the capsule, killing the crew within seconds.

The autopsy report confirmed that the primary cause of death for all three astronauts was cardiac arrest caused by high concentrations of carbon monoxide. The third degree burns suffered by the crew were not believed to be major factors, and it was concluded that most of those had occurred postmortem. Asphyxiation happened after the fire melted the astronauts' suits and oxygen tubes, exposing them to the lethal atmosphere of the cabin. An Apollo 1 mission patch was left on the Moon's surface by Apollo 11 crew members Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin, and the Apollo 15 mission left a tiny memorial statue, Fallen Astronaut, on the surface of the Moon along with a plaque containing the names of the Apollo 1 astronauts.

Blimey, our Tommy sure knew how to pick ‘em!

I have also included the B-side, School For Fools, a rarity in as much as (instead of simply narrating) Tommy attempts to sing, affecting a not unpleasant Johnny Cash-like lilt.

Enjoy!

Fly Like an Eagle

I’m not, by any stretch of the imagination, a sports fan. However even the most curmudgeonly among us would have to acknowledge the truly remarkable achievement of Team GB at the recent Olympics. Their historic medal haul is only to be applauded – and the countless millions invested in British sport in recent years (thanks mostly to our national lottery) certainly seems to have paid off. No doubt we’ll see what – if any – difference this will make to participation in sport as a whole and to the overall health and wellbeing of the country, but the feelgood factor cannot be denied.

Purely co-incidentally, earlier this week we sat down and watched Eddie the Eagle, the almost entirely fictitious tale of Michael ‘Eddie’ Edwards, the British skier who in 1988 became the first competitor since 1929 to represent Great Britain in Olympic ski jumping. The movie itself, not unlike director Dexter Fletcher’s earlier Sunshine on Leith, is a pleasant enough, unchallenging watch but you’ll learn more about Mr Edwards by reading his entry on Wikipedia than watching it.

Unfortunately our Eddie’s recording career was completely ignored by the movie (and barely gets a mention on Wikipedia). Mr Edwards recorded two singles, the first being the better-known Fly Eddie, Fly/Straight to the Top which was released in the UK in 1988 (on Fly Records, catalogue number Eagle 1). I have a vague recollection of seeing him mime to this on Top of the Pops or some similar programme, but it does not appear to have made the British singles charts (according to Eddie’s biography, Eddie the Eagle: My Story it was on Terry Wogan’s early evening chat show Wogan). Unperturbed, three years later Eddie made another record – this time in Finnish!

Reading Suomi phonetically off idiot boards, Eddie recorded Mun Nimeni On Eetu/Eddien Siivellä, which roughly translates as My Name Is Eetu/On Eddie’s Wing. Naturally, it is this coupling that I present to you today. This utterly ridiculous 45 was issued by the Finnish label AXR in 1991; a year later Eddie was forced to declare bankruptcy. I’m sure the two events are unrelated. According to Rohan Candappa’s book Rules Britannia: The 101 Essential Questions of Britishness Answered Mun Nimeni On Eetu was a number two hit in Finland, but Eddie decided to completely gloss over this in his own biography. I wonder why?

Enjoy!

Man, Do I Like Friday

Search the Internet for as long as you like, but you’ll discover that very little – make that absolutely nothing – about Roy Esser, the ‘unusual’ vocalist on these two tracks. Issued as a 7” on J-Rad Records of Hollywood at some point in the early 60s. In fact the disc - Can I Pawn My Teeth to You/Man Do I Like Friday - would have been forgotten if not for Dr Demento, who featured the b-side on his radio show back in 1981, or for fellow blogger and obscure music enthusiast Bob Purse, who posted both sides of the 45 at WFMU’s now inactive Beware of the Blog back in 2008. Thank you gentlemen!

Although I can find no information about Mr Esser, what is obvious is that the recordings I present for you today are somehow related to Sandy Stanton’s Film City set up. The clues are all there if you start to dig around. First of all there’s Stanton’s signature Chamberlin sound: Stanton promoted the primitive, mellotron-esque keyboard instrument and most of his records are swathed in the stuff. Then there’s the fact that both of the songs were published by Tweek Music, which appears to have been one of the many publishing companies owned by Ronald Solovay. Ron Solovay was an associate of Stanton who had also written and recorded for Stanton’s Action and Abbey labels.

Then there’s the address on the label, 6272 De Longpre Avenue, Hollywood: another important clue to this disc’s origin. In 1958 this was home to the Ruskin Export Company, and over the next few decades this nondescript little office block would house the Vine Medical Group, drinks importer Spirits of the World, and a number of doctors and dentists. However by the mid-60s J-Rad’s address was also the home of the Teron Recording Studio and record label. Teron, which had previously been at 1156 North Highland Avenue, Hollywood where they boasted of their complete tape and disc service and ‘major record company contacts’, was part owned by Ron Solovay. He’s the ‘Ron’ in TeRON: the TE was his business partner (at that time) Terry Dunavan.

All of which means that the Chamberlin player on these recordings is almost definitely Rodd Keith, who was recording for Stanton at that time under the pseudonym Rod Rogers. Yet to my ear the tracks don’t quite demonstrate Rodd’s usual flair, so I assumed that it’s m ore likely to be that player could be Stanton himself. It’s impossible to know for sure.

Or is it?

What we do know is that Dunavan and Solovay wrote and produced many tracks together over the years, usually working with a lyricist, and Dunavan had previously enjoyed a career as a rockabilly guitarist, releasing the incendiary (and these days very expensive) 45 Earthquake Boogie/Rocket to Mars on Fanfare Records in 1958 and other cuts on Devco. According to IMDB Dunavan appeared in the John Forsythe sitcom Batchelor Father in 1957; he was also one of the engineers on Jennifer Warnes’ Famous Blue Raincoat album (1987), having previously worked as an engineer for Frank Zappa on Over-Nite Sensation (1973) and Apostrophe (') (1974). He passed away in 1989 aged just 49.

At some point Ron Solovay changed his name to Leigh Crizoe and moved to New York. And it’s Ron Solovay (or Leigh Crizoe) who plays the Chamberlin on these tracks.

‘Yes, Leigh Crizoe and Ron Solovay are the same person: Me,’ the affable and approachable Mr Crizoe confirms. ‘That was actually recorded in 1963, and it was me who played the Chamberlain on that horrible record!

‘Back in 1963 Terry Dunavan and I were two young musicians who bought an old Magnacord recorder and opened up a small studio in Hollywood on a shoestring. My brother, who was in high school, built us a makeshift mixer that actually worked. We put ads in the newspaper to get clients.

‘Roy Esser came to our studio and wanted to put out a record of Can I Pawn My Teeth to You. It was the era of Tiny Tim, who (would go on to sell) millions of records being terrible. Roy paid us to have the record recorded and pressed up. Sandy Stanton, who I had worked for when I was in High School and for a time after, had a Chamberlin. I was one of the first people to play it, even before Rodd Keith.’

So now you know. The timeline could be a little out: Tiny Tim would not find fame for several years and Teron was registered at the DeLongpre address until at least 1967, but otherwise it all fits (apart from Leigh's assertion that Tim was terrible!)  A little further research has revealed just one Roy Esser living in California at that time: Roy H. Esser died, in Hawthorne, Los Angeles County, on January 1, 1979 six weeks short of his 67^th birthday and just over three years after he suffered a heart attack. If this is (well, was) our Roy then he would have been 41 when Leigh says the recordings were made.

Still active today, Leigh Crizoe has written and produced hundreds of jingles for radio and television commercials including Nobody Beats the Wiz for The Wiz Electronic Stores in NYC, which later became the basis for Nobody Beats the Biz recorded by Biz Markie (since sampled by NAS). Leigh also wrote the famous You’ve Got the Look, the Jordache Look designer jean commercials. His music has also been featured on Seinfeld, Saturday Night Live; more recently he’s been working as a radio presenter for NYTalkRadio.net, co-hosting a series with his partner Rhio on raw food and veganism.

Anyway, here are both sides of Roy Esser's solitary 45, Can I Pawn My Teeth to You/Man Do I Like Friday. 

Enjoy!